Previous page in Freedom Journey: Control Thoughts
This page covers some of the common temptation battles we're likely to face on the road to freedom. We can expect the devil to do everything he can to prevent us from walking to freedom. When these we face these temptations, we can stand confidently in faith in Jesus Christ, who will help us be victorious.
Victory over temptation usually depends on our ability to bring our eyes and thoughts under control, as we discussed previously in this study. In the following examples, we will demonstrate ways to apply the eye and thought control principles. Hopefully you'll notice the recurring patterns. This isn't rocket science, but it does require us to tenaciously bring our flesh into obedience to Christ. It takes practice to exercise our spiritual will over our fleshly will, but as we do, we will get better and better at it. The battle will get easier to win if we continue to respond in obedience to Jesus.
Since men and women are sometimes tempted in different ways, we've divided the below examples by gender. Though perspective can sometimes differ, the same principles of taking the thoughts captive and casting down the sinful imaginations will apply. Click here to skip to the Temptation Examples for Women.
Temptation Examples for Men
Computer example: The computer is a popular choice for viewing porn and soliciting sexual relationships. The secrecy and low cost make this medium particularly inviting. Since more and more of our lives are involved with the computer, we've got to be proficient at handling computer temptations.
Scenario: While surfing the net for ball bearing suppliers for his antique car, Steve notices several pornographic websites showing up on the search results. He's been down this road before, and he really wants to avoid the porn sites. For a few seconds, Steve considers his options. He knows that sick feeling in your gut that you get after you've been surfing for porn for hours. He's tired of failing and wants to live for Jesus for a change, but the thrill of seeing those sex pictures is powerful. It has an unexplainable pull on his mind. Things haven't been that great in the marriage bed for months and his wife seems out of touch with his sexual needs. What does he do?
Results: Steve succeeded in avoiding the easy click-through to trouble. As he resisted the intense pangs of temptation, he noticed that they grew weaker as he continued to resist. After singing the worship songs, Steve was back in the clear. He decided to shut down the computer for the evening and share with his wife about some of the things that he'd been frustrated about. This wasn't a guilt-trip designed to get sex from his wife, but an honest time of sharing his feelings and listening to his wife's responses. He also decided the next day to install a filtered internet service on his computer as a safeguard to help him avoid a repeat temptation.
Hotel example: For the traveling former porn addict, business stays in hotels can be a nightmare. More and more hotels are offering discreet porn options via cable TV. The combination of being separated from the family and the lure of illicit sex in the privacy of your room is often more than people can resist.
Scenario: Jim is a successful salesmen who travels every months for a day or two. Jim dislikes having to go on the road, but the customer visits really help boost his sales. Jim's company only authorizes him to stay in the Night Moves hotel chain that happens to offer porn on its cable TV system. In the past, Jim has asked the front desk clerk to turn off the porn option to his room, only to call back later and have her sign him back up. Jim has recently made a new start in his walk with Jesus and is determined to have victory over temptation on sales trips. As he is driving to the hotel for his first night, the thoughts of watching porn start to surface in his mind.
Results: After praying with Bill, Jim finally finds peace and is able to go to sleep without falling to the temptations. The next morning, Jim wakes up refreshed from a particularly good night's rest. This helped him in his sales appointments later that day. When he returned home that evening, it was great to be able to tell his wife that he had succeeded in having a great trip with no falls into porn.
Church lady example: Since many of our readers are church-going Christians, I thought I should include an example from a church setting. Satan often targets us in church with temptation to distract our worship of God and study of the Bible.
Scenario: It's Sunday morning and Dave and his wife Sue are headed into church. As they are walking in, they greet Jenny, one of their good friends from their neighborhood fellowship. After a few minutes, Sue leaves Dave to take their daughter into the nursery. Jenny and Dave continue to talk. Dave had been attracted to Jenny in the past, and today she seems especially inviting. She asks him about his work and other things, and shows attentive interest as he answers. It isn't long before Dave starts to wonder what it would like to have sex with Jenny.
Results: Though Dave initially dwelled on the fantasy about Jenny, he pulled out of danger and arrested the recurring pangs of temptation until they subsided. By the end of the song time, he was clear of the temptation and was able to focus on the scripture lesson. Dave decided that from that point on, he would refrain from being alone with Jenny.
Bikini beach example: Current bathing suit trends make going to the beach a tough purity challenge for recovering sex addicts. This does not mean that we have to give up going to the beach, but it does require that we take action to control our eyes.
Scenario: Ted and his wife Lisa are invited by another couple to go to the beach for lunch. Ted has been free of sex addiction for a few years at this point, but still finds the beach "scenery" difficult. It seems like every time he goes to the beach, he is surrounded by women in bikinis.
Results: Ted felt pretty good about his track record at the beach that day. He was delighted to hear that his actions helped him completely miss a temptation that his wife noticed. She told him that while he was talking to Nick, an attractive young woman walked up to look for shells on the beach right in front of them. She was bent over picking up shells for several minutes. Because Ted was keeping his eyes from wandering around, he didn't even see her!
example: The workplace is an easy target for
extramarital affairs. Since you are with your co-workers for eight to ten
hours a day, you tend to share a common bond. And since working is a
necessity to provide for our families, we must learn how to handle
ourselves appropriately when temptations strike.
Scenario: While working on the production
line at General Motors, Olivia notices how Steve is lifting her parts for
her, so she doesn’t have to bend down. He seems so caring and sensitive on
the job and they have even talked when the line was down. With her
marriage in a rut and her husband, Bob always away on business trips, she
considers what it would be like to have an affair with Steve. However, she
remembers how meaningless the last affair was and how it hurt everyone
involved. But, Olivia is desperate for love and attention. Olivia’s heart
is pounding, her head is telling her to “go for it” while her heart is
saying, “DON’T DO IT!” What does she do?
Chat room example: With internet and chat
rooms being only a click away, women, as well as men, are often lured into
seemingly innocent relationships. However, for someone who struggles with
sexual addiction, this can be a major trap.
Scenario: Tara has an hour to kill before
her husband gets home from work, the kids are down for the night, and she
has a strong desire to log on to the internet. She’s been chatting
regularly with Lucky Guy, a guy she’s never met, but she seems to have
more fun talking to him than listening to her husband’s boring work
stories every night. A trace of guilt comes over her, as she turns the
computer on. “What am I feeling guilty for? I’m not doing anything
wrong. I’m just talking to a friend. It’s not like I’m having an
affair or anything.” But the guilt doesn’t leave. Her heart is throbbing,
and adrenaline is rushing through her veins. She hasn’t felt that way
about her husband in years, but she feels this way about someone she has
never seen. She wants to log on more than anything, but the
scripture from earlier comes to mind, “Guard your hearts and minds in
Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6,
7). She knows that she should keep her heart and mind
clear from anything that would lead her away from God, but at the same
time, she sees Lucky Guy as just a friend to talk to. So, what does
Dating example: Dating can play on
anyone’s emotions and be a real snare to the sex addict. The excitement
and thrill in the beginning relationship are sometimes misleading and
alluring. Since dating is definitely a prerequisite to marriage, we need
to be sure we can handle ourselves appropriately.
After Naomi had been dating Kyle
for a few weeks, he began to pressure her for sex. Naomi kept thinking
what it would be like. The more she fantasized, the more excited she
became. She reasoned that since Kyle said he loved her, it would be okay
to have sex with him. However, as a new Christian, she kept remembering
what she had heard in last week’s sermon, “If a man even lusts after a
woman, he has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matt.
5:28). Naomi’s conscience is telling her
to repent and back off from Kyle, but her heart is reasoning, “Well, if
I’m already guilty, I might as well go all the way, right?” She’s torn
between what seems right and what feels right. What does she
Personal Application Questions:
Next page in Freedom Journey: Wrap-Up
Copyright © 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005 www.Porn-Free.Org. All Rights Reserved.
If you find a typo, grammatical error or broken hyperlink on this page, please contact us mentioning the page title and location - Thank You!